Growing up, the person closest to me convinced me I was unlovable by the people in my life who were supposed to love me most. Through careless words and actions, I was told, “They don’t care about you.” These words, coming from someone I cared about, shaped my life before I ever had a chance to believe something different. Without consciously realizing it, I believed in my heart, mind, soul, and strength that I was not good enough to be loved. 

So, years later I wasn’t expecting God to open this curtain to see this living memory I had closed for so long. But now, I can step toward the window and see more clearly.

Now at 32 years old, I can stand in the window and see myself as a 12, 13, 16, year-old girl who felt unlovable. I can look at my younger self with compassion. I can extend kindness to myself because I can now understand why I let men have my body at a young age and why I allowed fitness to be a tool so men could love me simply because of the way I looked.

He is calling me into the wild this season. He is urging me to step toward these painful memories, not away from them. Not so He can throw me to the wolves but so I can lay in the endless green pastures He provides for me. He leads me to the wilderness so I can understand the love of the Father, with my whole heart, soul, mind, and strength, without the weight (or opinions) of the world.

Many of us often fear the wild, the desert lands, and the dry seasons. We fear the unknown and are afraid of the danger that may lie ahead. May I suggest that what feels like the wild, desert lands, and dry seasons are nothing more than refinement (if and only if we choose to allow the refinement to happen.)

When we read through John 15, Jesus teaches us that the goal of the pruning process is so that we can bear more fruit. God is a fruit bearer. If we are not connected to the vine we can not bear fruit. Just like a twig found on the side of the road. That twig will not bear fruit or reproduce because it’s not connected to the source that gave it life.

Pruning is not about taking away. It’s about refinement. It’s about partnering with the Spirit to create and bear more fruit than you knew existed. 

Looking through the window staring at my younger self with kindness and compassion, I can begin to reframe this old story and narrative in my heart (mind) that I may not have noticed was on repeat since those words were spoken over me.

Whether you feel like you are in the land of milk and honey or a season is desert and dry land, your body doesn’t forget your memories. Your body holds the posture of your heart. When you move your body, it tells your story. 

I have learned that it’s tough to walk into the land of milk and honey when I still believe I am a slave. Those unloveable words got stuck inside my good body. They prevented and blocked the flow of the Father’s love and love from others. For so long, I kept people at arm’s length to be safe from getting hurt again.

I’m thankful for this season of refinement because it allows time to strip away the remains of the old me that got stuck in my body after I received my new me (in spirit, which is the renewing process).

Your thoughts are the language of your brain, and your feelings are the language of your body. 

So, I pray you ask the Lord to open a new curtain so that you can look through a window of your life with kindness and compassion and begin to heal.

I pray that you move your body with a new story as you enter into refinement with joy and gladness that more fruit is coming. 

Sons and daughters, you are free. The land of milk and honey is yours. 

Jessica loves helping women “weigh” less emotionally, physically, and spiritually and to know their authority and identity in Christ. Check out her podcast and website to learn more about her work!

Thank you for reading this week’s Revelation Wellness Blog!

This month our theme is Through the Wild! Have you ever wanted to lead people to God in the outdoors? We are so excited to announce RevWild: Revelation Wellness Outdoor Leadership Training! Whether you’re a seasoned outdoors enthusiast or you simply want to learn how to experience the presence of God in the wilderness, Revelation Wellness Outdoor Leadership Training (RevWild) will equip you to use the adventure of the outdoors to facilitate community experiences centered around loving God, getting healthy, being whole, and loving others.

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Workout with us in this #wednesdayworkout! For more workouts like this visit, RevWell TV!

KARA’S CARDIO STRENGTH HIIT – “WALKING IN LIGHT”

HIIT (or High-Intensity Interval Training) is a training technique in which you move with your all-out, one hundred percent effort, in short, intense bursts of exercise, followed by short, sometimes active, recovery periods. This type of training gets and keeps your heart rate up, maximizing your workout time. (ADVANCED) (ISAIAH 9:2; HAND WEIGHTS)