Much of life is filled with uncertainties, but God has promised us peace through it all. Kim shares her story and Scriptures to keep you rooted in God's peace.
Unexpected Suffering
I’ve always loved to write.
As a young girl, I wrote letters to cousins, pen pals, and boys I met on summer vacations. I like notepads, sticky notes, and the backs of used envelopes to jot down a thought before it escapes my mind and I risk losing it forever. Since the birth of my first boy in 1994, I have kept a journal. This blog post was inspired by one of those journal entries.
May 23, 2012
As we continue in our second year without Justin, I am still finding great peace in my Jesus. As I am confident of God’s character and purpose, I am certain of Justin’s character and purpose.
Now let me explain that journal entry.
On January 20, 2011, we walked into our home to find our 16-year-old son dead from a gunshot wound to his head.
There were no signs of forced entry, no struggle, and no suicide note. Only gut-wrenching grief and a surreal void. Within an hour, the house and yard were filled with family, friends, and neighbors. The question then and still today from some is, “What happened?”
On that day, the Lord clearly said to me, “You won’t know, and it won’t matter.” Those words still bring great peace to me.
The watching world said it must have been an accident, an intruder, or self-inflicted. Family members speculated and named names. Confused teens put their heads together and wondered who would do such a thing.
John, my husband, and I drew close to our Great Healer and armed ourselves with scripture to protect our other son and our marriage. Then we waited. We waited to see what God would do next. If God’s character was all we knew it to be, there would come a purpose for our suffering.
While you wait, rest in the knowledge of God’s unchanging character and know that He has a purpose for your pain.
Scriptures for God’s peace and healing in the unknown:
Romans 8:18 “For I consider these present trials nothing compared to the glory that will be revealed in Christ Jesus.”
Isaiah 61:3 “To comfort all who mourn; to provide for those who grieve in Zion, to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, a mantle of praise instead of a spirit of despair.”
Isaiah 40:31 “but those who keep waiting for the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
2 Timothy 1:7 (my own life verse that becomes more relevant to me daily) “For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind.”
God Meant It For Good
As the days turned into years, the Lord was faithful, and a beautiful ministry was created out of what the enemy intended for evil.
Justin’s nickname was Premo, and he played guitar in the youth praise band. Our family has long loved music as a form of expression and worship, and God gifted us with the resources to share that with others. We now have the privilege of assisting other evangelistic organizations in sharing the gospel through concerts, outdoor events, and even group exercise!
The ministry has grown, and the Lord has given us great joy in sharing His love with others in such a needed area for church growth.
Since becoming a Revelation Wellness Instructor in 2021, the board of directors has humbled me by including women’s wellness in Premo Ministries. As a nurse, RevX instructor, and trained Precept leader, I disciple women spiritually and physically. The possibilities of freedom are endless!
We recently hosted a morning of kickboxing and choreographed drumming to fund missionaries to the deaf in Mexico. This was a particularly special opportunity as it benefited the sweet family that took Justin and me on our first mission trip together in 2010.
He is Still Faithful
Still, it hasn’t been an easy 12 years.
We struggled through and were blessed by an international adoption in 2015. Our middle child, that brought us great comfort after Justin passed, has walked away from his Christian upbringing. Those stories aren’t mine to tell and maybe never will be. I love all my boys. I am grateful for the hope and promise of eternity with Jesus, Justin, and my beloved husband, John. I’ll continue to love and pray for my other boys. I would not want to have missed any lesson or opportunity the Lord intended for me through parenting.
In James 1:2-3 it says, “Consider it joy, my brothers, when you are involved in various trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance. But you must let endurance have its full effect, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing.”
Lacking nothing.
Not even peace.
And while you wait, rest in the knowledge of God’s unchanging character and know that He has a purpose for your pain. If you write it down, you, too, can look back years later and be confident in His promises and your own resilience.
These Psalms can help you find peace in the waiting and the unknown:
Psalm 25:3 “Let none that wait on You be ashamed.”
Psalm 25:4-5 “Show me Your ways, O Lord; teach me Your paths. Lead me in your truth and teach me: for You are the God of my salvation: on you do I wait all day.”
Psalm 25:21 “Let integrity and uprightness preserve me; for I wait for You.”
Psalm 27:14 “Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and He will strengthen your heart. Wait, I say, on the Lord.”
Kim Dobbs lives in Birmingham, Alabama with her husband of 30 years and her 15-year-old son, Paul. Kim is a RevX instructor from Platoon 27.
13 Responses
Kim thank you for sharing your story. Thank you for the reminder that we are not alone! God always has a reason for our good but even for our family.
Thank you for sharing, Diana!
Thank you for reading and responding, Diana. I see we are from the same platoon! God bless you!
Hi Kim, thank you so much for sharing your story. I lost my son 4 years ago from a heroin overdose. One of the things that brought me comfort; is the fact that the Holy Spirit told me 2 times that I wouldn’t have my son much longer. I just pondered that in disbelief. He loved the Lord and we became so close before he died. Our relationship, grew stronger… we really enjoyed our relationship. I miss him so much. God bless you! Oh, I’m a nurse too!
I’m sorry for your loss, Cindy. Thank you for sharing and I’ll make sure Kim gets your message!
Good morning,
Thank you for sharing your story. It gave me hope that my suffering of the trauma of my family situation is not in vain.
In his Grace!
Barbara
Amen, Barbara! Praying for you in your situation. God is there!
Beautiful testimony of waiting on and trusting in our loving God-His character and promises-and not leaning on your own understanding for healing and hope. Thank you for sharing your story and His faithfulness in pain and inspiring us to keep believing that God does use all things for His glory…and isn’t that what life is really about-His glory!
Thank you for sharing, Michele! I’ll make sure Kim gets your message!
Having 3 sons myself every time I read or hear Kim’s story I can’t stop the tears from falling. Ive lost many a family member including both parents and it was tough. But I still have my boys, we are close and I hope and pray to God that I have the faith and strength that Kim does if I ever lose one of them to death. It was close in 2001 when my youngest had a motorcycle wreck in New Orleans and was in a coma for 48 days. More than one night his Dr said to me I’m not sure he will make it through the night. But the Lord wasn’t ready for Jody yet and he is a thriving 49 year old today. Thank you Kim for your willingness and generosity in sharing your story and just for being the person that you are. I believe that God puts each person in our lives for a reason and you have been a wonderful mentor, teacher and a good friend.
Thank you for sharing and responding, Judith! I’ll make sure Kim gets your message!
Thank you for sharing and for continuing to serve The Lord!
Thank you, Dianna!