Your kids are watching you. What do they see? Here are three tips to reinforce a positive body image with your children.
We were on a family vacation to Florida several years ago. It was a long-awaited trip, and I was so excited to have the entire family in one place for a relaxing week at the beach.
I vividly remember one morning in particular. I was sitting in bed getting ready to start my day when I noticed my 4-year-old daughter was already wide awake.
She was standing in front of the full-length mirror hanging over the bathroom door. Except that she wasn’t just standing there. She was kissing her face in the mirror. I watched in awe and listened to her joyful little giggle as she scrunched up her nose, shook her beaded hair, and twirled around in endless circles. She was filled with joy over the reflection she saw in the mirror. On that day I realized that I am on a mission to not be the one who taught her how to hate her body.
Here are three ways I teach my daughter to love her body:
1. Words: I speak life over myself
It’s hard as women always to love our bodies. I truly understand that challenge. But, I know how quickly my kids pick up on my language and they remember the things that I say.
All I have to do is watch them argue with each other to see which one was watching me the most. They pick up on my voice inflections, my body language, and even the exact words I’ve used.
Because they are so incredibly impressionable, I am committed to only speaking positive words about my body when my daughters (and sons) are present.
2. Body Language: I reflect joy when she's watching
Maybe you have the speaking part under control.
But what about the faces you make and the body language you portray when you look in the mirror? Do you scrunch your face in disgust? Or, do you pinch, poke and pull at the fluffier parts?
One day I noticed my daughter looking in the mirror and turning her body slightly to the side as she made the same hand gesture I do when assessing whether my abs are flat enough. I was shocked. From that day forward I was determined to be extra vigilant with my reflection in the mirror towards my own body.
3. God's Word: I replace lies with the truth.
It’s inevitable that we will hear our girls talk negatively about their bodies. When I hear my girls say something like “I’m just so fat”, or “My hair is so ugly” I could tell them they are wrong and encourage them to move on with their day.
But, as a Christian mom, I feel that it’s really important to not only shut down the lie but replace it with the God-breathed truth that comes from the Bible. When I hear my girls speak lies about themselves, I am determined to sit with them and open God’s Word so it is etched in their hearts for good.
Sweet mama, you are on such an important mission from such a perfect God. He chose you so perfectly for that little girl of yours. And you sweet mama, are doing a good job. Look in the mirror, smile big, and know that you and your daughter are loved by a God who designed you in His perfection.
In the comments below, share your ideas for reinforcing a positive body image for your children!
Kristen Ekiss is an adoptive mom of 4, speaker, health educator, and Navy Veteran who resides in Waukesha, WI. The mission of her ministry is to teach women how to grow a stronger faith, raise a stronger family, and build a stronger body. Check out her website to learn more!
8 Responses
Love this, and you, Friend!! Well done ❤️
Thank you for reading the blog, Jenn!
This is really good! I am guilty of SETTING am bad example , but i do love to verbal thang God for ,y body when my knees hurt going uo the stairs. Even when it is hard to do some I like to say, “thank you God for this body amd that i a, able to move it Around !” I need to be more inten anout speaking life over my body instead of POINTING out the fact tjat i need to lose more weight or get in better shaoe. I wamt to ,odel that for my daughters as well as for the other girls (young amd old) that i have INFLUENCE over! Very good article
Your desire for showing your daughters a better way is right from the Lord. We all fail at this sometimes, but I pray that He gives you eyes to love your body and to teach your daughters to love theirs!
I love this Kristen! Thank you for sharing intentional, yet simple ways to gove our kiddos a healthy perspective on their bodies.
Yes! This is so helpful. Thanks for reading, Bailey!
So good. Speaking Gods truth is key. Most effective thing I see in my own experience with this is truly living free in this area myself which I won’t lie is a journey I am still on with many twists and turns, ups and downs…but God! Great is His faithfulness!!! My 3 daughter have seen this journey they respect my fight for freedom. I’m open and honest and pray freedom over them as well on a daily basis. Now 28, 22 & 18 we are all more like friends sharing really than parent/child sharing, as it should be. My empty words of body image freedom (saying the right thing but still hard at work physically striving for the perfect body) early in their life did not help, it wasn’t until RevWell that I truly began this true body image freedom journey. They see the difference now for sure. Thank God it’s never too late to get free, stay free and set free!
What a beautiful testimony!! Thanks for sharing, Christy.